Oh My Effing GAWD

This was a conversation between me and a supposedly (posing as, I suspect) industry-pro of a marketing manager for a supposedly established events management company.

Me : "I have a proposal for my client, Singapore Science Centre and they're looking to do a Festival coming March."

Her (in very auntie ah soh buying fish from market voice) : "ah yes. How much your budget?"

Me : "I don't really have those figures yet, I'm currently proposing to them."

Her : "So your event is what?"

Me : "It's a Festival being held by Singapore Science Centre."

Her : "So what kind of event har? Dinner and dance is it?"

Me : "NO, its a FEST-ival."

Her : "So where is this festival?"

Me (sarcastically) : "It's by Singapore Science Centre, where do you think it should be at?"

Her : " In town is it?"

OH MY F**KING GAWD. It should be legal to shoot stupidity like that.

The Rant Post From The Office

Well, for the first time in weeks, I'm bored at work, waiting for clients to revert, waiting for emails to confirm, waiting for the clock to hit 6.00pm, waiting waiting waiting.

Yes, I'm bored. Very.

One thing that has come to mind on and off is that I seem to have fallen off the blogging bandwagon. I still take snapshots with my phone, i've taken quite a number more wth my digicam. Snapshots that upon reviewing were rather nice in their quality or composition, but frankly were too lazy to upload and share.

So here and now in the office, bereft of my own laptop with specially selected pictures (and photoshop ffs!) I shall attempt use my time effectively enough to write an entry that endeavours to be engaging and entertaining in its read.

Yeah right. You very free also hor?

Ok time for random thoughts spewing;

1) Which blinking moron actually thinks Mahatir deserves a Nobel PEACE prize? For someone so obviously antagonistic towards the West, bitterly jealous over Singapore's economic success and rather ham fisted in his oh-so-obvious overthrowing of his former deputy Anwar cos' he couldn't handle the competition (which also sparked off riots in KL), yeah I can see how he is such a paragon of virtous peace making ideals.

2) My god. I know I'm working in a rather Chinese-oriented company but even the enunciation of Shirlyn and Charlene is something most of my colleagues struggle at.

3) I had a rather weird dream last night, where I was a resident in Wisteria Lane, having to plot how best to burn Sarah Jessica Parker's house down cos' she slept with the Blonde Best Friend's friend's boyfriend and someone ended up in jail or something. Yes it's the worst mash up of SATC and Desperate Housewives ever and it only happens here in my dreams.

4) After the recent almost-meltdown I had with regard to working on the 3M pitch, I have come to the conclusion that while being initiative-driven might be an admirable quality, it's mostly a waste of time when you work for a mostly-family-run company.

5) Got an offer to buy a 1Gb thumb-drive for only S$34 bucks.

6) What's more icky than coyly cruising that cutie at a couple of tables away during your company's D&D only to find out that he isn't an undiscovered hottie from the Creatives Department or whatever but he's the cousin of your manager? Ok probably alot more but I backpedaled from making that contact faster than you can say "They're building a WHAT at Mt. Faber?!"

7) What's sexier than knowing that you put on more than 8kg cos' you haven't worked out for like a year and your former FB still finds you hot?

8) I'm becoming used to kopi-O-peng every morning. Not exactly as glamourous as a cuppa ice blended from Coffee Bean every morning but alot more decidedly economical.

9) Just when I think I might have seen/experienced all the levels of queen-dom one could ever see/experience (I did work in a cabaret for over 3 years dammit!), a new designer bemuses me by speaking pseudo-French loudly on his handphone and has to moisturise his hands like 5 times a day in the office.

10) Whatever may happen, I'm gonna spend my birthday this year out of this god-knows-we're-repressed country. I'm also not above accepting donations for this endeavour

Freaking Acronyms

Ok correct me if I'm wrong but today was a revelation for me in terms of our country's love for acronyms.

I was reading an article on Singapore when I came across the name Sellapan Ramanathan, mentioned in a current affairs article.. Now as a fellow Singaporean, what does that name mean to you?

I was slightly stunned and curious. I thought "Since when did it change/ Who is this feller that the article was referring to?

Sellapan Ramananthan. Who is he?

Well, I'm ashamed to say this but that's our return-unopposed-but-supposedly-elected President of Singapore, S R Nathan.

Perhaps it's the norm for Indian/Tamil names to be shortened as such, I don't know, could someone enlighten me please? But for many of my friends, including some in NUS, nobody knew who I was talking about when I went on MSN and started asking around.

I think it's a sad day indeed and speak volumes about politics in Singapore and how apathetic my generation is, when most of us don't even know the full name of our very own (supposedly beloved, accordig to the media) President.

Another ridiculous acronym I came across, lovingly labelled by our own civil service, was APPLES. Now I don't know about you, but I like to think that a document as important as your own passport should not be cheapened and shortened to a fruit in a market, no matter what they say about an apple a day and the doctor and all that.

I could go on and on about our country's silly love for acronyms. But I'll leave it here for now. *roll eyes*

Talk To Her Uncaring Hand

I'm not sure if you have heard of this recent issue, about a certain Miss Wee Shu Min, daughter of Ang Mo Kio GRC MP Wee Siew Kim, making totally insensitive, derogatory and insulting remarks about a Mr Derek Wee in her blog.

In her entry, which I won't elaborate but you can read it here.

It blew up over the local blogging community, so much so that her father was forced to make an apology that so was NOT an apology.

Frankly, I don't give a shit. If poeple took this long to realise that there ARE social elites in the country who truly look down upon them, who treat going into areas like coffeeshops and HDB estates like they are doing charity work, then they deserve the rude shock coming to them.

So why am I posting this?

'Cos during lunch I was of all things, called up by a reporter for MY reaction to this whole bunch of bullshit. Why my reaction? Well if you don't know why then I'll leave you to figure it out but I was relishing the irony of asking me. The pesty reporter was from none other than my "fave" trashy tabloid of the nation, TNP, of course.

I was mostly silent for the phone conversation after saying "Hi" and affirming I was who I was on the phone, I listened with a growing sense of deja vu as she rambled on and on about the issue. Then came the moment I was actually waiting for, which sprung to mind while her irritating whiny voice was talking.

TNP Reporter : "So what are your views on this, especially with how MP Wee referred to his daughter's behaviour?"

Me : "Frankly, I think he's a hypocrite, but then again he's a politician. Coming to think of it, I think your call's kinda hypocritical too. Now you're spoiling my lovely lunch so I'm gonna hang up. Ta!"

Geez, the fucking nerve of asking ME.

Anyway, here's a pic of that "biatch". Me wonders, does elitism have a certain "look" ? Cos' she sure resembles another pudgy complexion-challenged stumpy girl I know with pretty much the same attitude. :P Perhaps the Best Friend can shed some light. :P

Haze In Singapore

Warning - Picture heavy post!

Decided to link this to my other blog instead of reproducing en bloc.

The Cask Of Amontillado

If you are a fan of Edgar Allan Poe, the above picture is a very refreshing take on the classic, The Cask of Amontillado.

As a kid, I read this story and was morbidly fascinated by the idea of being walled up alive. Truth to tell, I was rather fascinated with various forms of death that were long and drawn out. The macabreness of one's realisation of the impending end yet impotency to do anything about it, sends a chill of horror and titillation down my spine. Much as we homo sapiens behave like we control the world around us, the fact is we control very little indeed. If indeed I could choose which forms of death I would not want to experience, it'd be;

1) Being buried alived.

2) Being walled up alive.

3) Drowning.

4) Suffocation.

I used to list falling from a great height amongst those but I read somewhere your neck snaps mid fall and you're most likely dead before you ever hit the ground so that eliminates its eligibility from "Long drawn out deaths I wouldn't wanna gro through" for me.

Happy Hallow's Eve.

First They Came

First They Came ~ Martin Niemoller

When the Nazis came for the communists,
I remained silent;
I was not a communist.

When they locked up the social democrats,
I remained silent;
I was not a social democrat.

When they came for the trade unionists,
I did not speak out;
I was not a trade unionist.

When they came for the Jews,
I did not speak out;
I was not a Jew.

When they came for me,
there was no one left to speak out.

At the risk of sounding overly dramatic, it seems with recent times its easier for a state to be overrun by facism than ever. Recent events displaying the callous disregard for external sentiments and feelings not pertaining to what the Government wants sends a silent chill down one's spine if you choose to take a step back and consider it.

Fascism isn't an overnight revolution. It starts insidiously, slowly. The collection of authority and power into the hands of a select few. It stacks up over time like a pile of stones, until one wakes up one day to find a mountain of errors and "its always been this way" excuses and by then, it might be too late.

What *is* facism? According to Wikipedia, it states that "Fascism is a radical totalitarian political philosophy that combines elements of corporatism, authoritarianism, extreme nationalism, militarism, anti-anarchism, anti-communism and anti-liberalism." Another consideration of facism is that "Fascism is also typified by totalitarian attempts to impose state control over all aspects of life: political, social, cultural, and economic".

Cheem siah...

I'm not saying that we live in a facist country. We don't. But we could. The political apathy of the majority of the population attests to this. The complacency of the people to leave decisions up to the policy makers paves the way for this. An election system that sees a party largely returned to power before polling even begins & regulations favouring the incumbent allows this. The lack of credible debate and discussion avenues that affects policy BEFORE it is implemented shows this. The crackdown on dissident voices, opposing views and alternative opinions proves this.

The greatest harm often come of the greatest of intentions. It doesn't take evil men for evil deeds to happen.

The problem is, not many Singaporeans can be bothered about this. There is so much wrong about our systems in Singapore, from;

1) a judicial system that presumes guilt before proven innocence.

2) a collection of government watchdogs that claim to plan for "open-ness" but clamp down hard on any form of alternative-ness other than their own.

3) a one party government that has presided over an ever increasing income gap between the rich & the poor and is so out of touch with real life issues yet gets re-elected thanks to its monopoly on the media.

4) a standard of living that rises every day and every year but minimum wages that hasn't risen to suit.

5) an economy that sees its people working to feed the government multi-national companies that virtually controls every facet of life we partake in.

6) a National Pledge that recites "regardless of race, language or religion" but sees its government persecuting Jehovah's Witnesses, depriving the entire gay community of any form of recognition or expression and recently, even helping a foreign government persecute Falungong activists trying to drum up support for their own plight back home.

7) a government so confident of its own authoritarian rule that it even puts the facade of inviting debate on the casino issue & then steamrolled ahead with its implementation plans anyway and politely telling the World Bank & IMF that it wants it business but it'll ignore their views on allowing peaceful demonstrations outside its meetings.

The list goes on. But it gets more and more depressing if I were to write on. Did I mention that suicide rates are up too? I kid you not.

So what are we to do? The MDA's favourite tag line recently seems to be "give us solutions" (especially over that silly Mr Brown incident) but frankly, what can an average guy like me do when everywhere you turn or whichever corner you round, you are actively blocked, governed and basically conditioned against speaking out?