A Guide To Commonly Used Terms On Dating Sites

Recently got back into the sack er... game. I was pretty baffled by all the nonsense people spout these days. If you're like me, I hope you find this to be helpful. LOL

P.S Sorry if this is offensive to anyone. It's purely tongue in cheek!

A Guide to Commonly Used Terms on "Dating" Sites

1. STRAIGHT-ACTING = Remembers to lock his wrist every once in a while. Also believes that using the term "Dude!" in conversations makes him sound "man". Can be found hanging out with "TOP".
2. GYM-BOD = Commutes between home and gym everyday.
3. BUFFED = Steroid-induced pecs and abs. Knows all sources of good protein. A dinner date with him will probably see only you eating while he helpfully tells you the amount of calories and fats in between bites.
4. NO EFFEMS/CROSS DRESSERS = Only one bitch in a relationship at a time. In this case, it's him. See "BOTTOM".
5. MSN ME = Wishes to monopolize your time online.
6. I'M NOT EASY TO GET = He is, but he believes this makes him sound less needy.
7. FUN-LOVING = I'm here for sex.
8. HANDSOME GUYS ONLY = Been told since he was 3 what a God's gift to women everywhere he ws by his doting mother. Also firmly believes he's too good for YOU.
9. JUST HERE TO MAKE FRIENDS = I'm here for sex but I'm discreet.
10. TOP = Believes that being a bottom makes him too gay. See "STRAIGHT ACTING".
11. BOTTOM = Only son / had sisters and female cousins only for company when growing up.
12. I'M NICE = Has absolutely nothing to contribute to a conversation. Be prepared to monologue by yourself.
13. I'M BAD = Believes that having sex in the living room/kitchen is the height of hedonism.
14. I AM ATTACHED = Cannot be seen in public with you.
15. I LOVE TO TRAVEL = Cabin crew.
16. IF YOU'RE NOT CUTE, DONT EVEN BOTHER = Looking for more glamour-shots type of profile to add to his Facebook / MySpace / Friendster.
17. I AM SENSITIVE, LOVING, CARING AND HONEST = Above 45years in age. Probably came out to himself after his failed 2nd marriage. Still hopes it might not be too late.
18. I GIVE GOOD MASSAGE = Orchard Towers masseur looking to do freelance on the sideline.
19. NO PIC, NO REPLY = Believes he's God's gift to gay men everywhere with a self proclaimed Simon Cowell personality.. See "HANDSOME GUYS ONLY".
20. DISCREET = Attached and looking to have one-night-stands on the side. See "I AM ATTACHED".
21. CURIOUS STRAIGHT MALE = Dead fish in bed. Be prepared to do ALL the work.
22. SWIM-BOD = Former GYM-BOD.
23.FUN-SEEKING = Disease carrier. See also "FUN-LOVING".
24. QUIET AND SOFT-SPOKEN = Closeted freak who is so paranoid at home, he believes that answering a phone call could out him. See "STRAIGHT-ACTING" and "TOP".
25. MACHO = Closeted BOTTOM.
26. HOMEBODY = Free-loading bum who's occupation has never stated anything other than "Unemployed".
27. OUT-GOING PERSONALITY = Flaming queen.
28. I DONT LIKE CASUAL SEX = Attached feller who wants a regular fuckbuddy. See also "DISCREET".
29. LOOKING FOR A SOULMATE = Late teens / early 20s who's watched Sex and the City way too many times.
30. I AM NOT HANDSOME = Definitely thinks he is but believes this makes him sound modest. See "HANDSOME GUYS ONLY".
31. I'M HANDSOME, INTELLIGENT, GORGEOUS = Purchased a makeover package recently and believes that's all that it takes.
32. SHY TYPE = See " I AM SENSITIVE, LOVING, CARING AND HONEST" and "CURIOUS STRAIGHT MALE".
33. I’M SENSIBLE = Expect to go dutch on dates. Clashes with "HOMEBODY".
34. I’M NOT JUST INTERESTED IN SEX = Utterly tired of getting rejected.
35. BISEXUAL = Dead fish in bed, but can be persuaded to give a blowjob. For like 45secs.
36. BOYTOY = Over 30s, desperate to be young again.
37. NATURE-LOVER = Doesn't have his own place, may have to do "it" in a deserted park/ under the flyover at Fort Road / East Coast public restrooms if you don't either.
38. HEALTHY INDIVIDUAL = Has every supplement product from GNC & Nature's Farm.
39. EXECUTIVE TYPE = Doesn't own a gym membership.
40. TYPICAL GUY = Totally boring on a date, fucks like a jackrabbit and falls sleep right after he ejaculates.
41. I AM SENSITIVE = Desperately seeking a relationship. Would sms you "miss you" and "love you" after the first date. Believes sex = marriage.
42. I HAVE A WONDERFUL MIND = His excuse for why he's THAT fat. See also "EXECUTIVE TYPE".
43. I AM THE LIFE OF THE PARTY = Party-scene queen. Never home on Friday, Saturday AND Sunday nights before 4am. See also "OUTGOING PERSONALITY".
44. DECENT GUY = Over 40s living with his parents, firmly believes his family still thinks he's straight.
45. I AM FUNNY = Watches sitcoms and laughs along with the laughter tracks. See "I'M NICE".
46. PURE TOP = Been discovered to have a "chocolate berry" once when he was bottom and never got over the embarassment.

My DK Is A Rocker Chick

A late night / early morning stroll with my iPod inspired me when this song started playing. For some strange reason I began to think of how death knights are supposedly resurrected on the fields of battle (by the Scourge no less) and what this means overall to their lives. What happens when they meet former loved ones?

Anyway, doing back stories has always been a favourite theme of mine. Hope you enjoy this one half as much as I did making it!

For The Little Lock On The Hill

I was browsing one of the warlock forums I go to, when a post by the site's moderator caught my eye.

It was a tribute to "the little lock on the hill", a personal account by another warlock player 2 years ago this day (May 24 2007).

When I first read his account, I blinked, then started tearing.

This is the post the original poster, Tanorthewarlock from US Azgalor server, made on The Warlocks Den forums.

"Well...how to start? By getting to the point i guess...my nephew who is 7 years old pasted away today. As i sit the tears have already started to roll. But i wanted to tell you of his level 11 gnome warlock on my account,also on my sever.

He has spent 4 days 7 hrs and some change playing. Alot of time to be only level 11 huh? Well, the first day we played he wanted to make a toon like mine but he wanted his to be "little like him,so he made a gnome. And i was all over him the first few hours...with,"no go over here"" no, you want to wear those pants they are better than yours" " "no, the deer dont give you experence" "why are you going to kill those level 3 kobalds again?"

To which many of his answers where, " i like hearing those guys say "you no take candle" to which he would squeel. As for the pants he just didnt like them,he kept his pants he got in the begining. Said they were his lucky pants. He said his imp liked eating the deer,to which i would be like "no...they dont eat the deer".He would see how long it took him to get thru that cave of kobalds over and over and over again.

After all my "advice" and suggestion on "spell rotations" and how to use his imp effectivly, he told me that a game should be fun and everything i told him was confusing and made his head hurt.

From that day foward i let him do whatever he wanted as long as he wanted to. He loved killing kobalds, running around trees, killing cows, and playing his lock the way he wanted to,even if uncle "tanor" didnt think it was "efficient".

He loved coming over and playing,I gave up many a kara spot so he could do his speed runs on the cave of kobalds. Becuse when it all came down to it those epics were just purple pixels on a screen and my nephews smile will forever be in my memory and the squeel when the kobald would say"you no take my candle".

So I have taken his lock(at level 11 now and forever) and parked him on a hill looking out at the starting valley in northshire.

So to my little warlock,my nephew, my little buddy, who loved his uncle as much as his uncle loved him you will always be in my heart and that smile will always be with me."

I cried when I finished reading this. I have been playing this game for 4 years and so often, oh very often I find myself getting pissed off or mad at things that really, at the end of it all shouldn't and doesn't matter.

Two years later the perspective of a sweet kid really shocked me into realising that yes, WoW IS a game and it should be fun. The little nitty gritty things shouldn't matter more than the people with whom you enjoy the game with. At the same time, it's also crucial to take the time out to show some appreciation to those whom you love around you.

All the fun crazy stuff I used to do with my warlock and which I hardly have the time to indulge in now, takes on special meaning for me from now on. It shouldn't always be the case but I'm glad I'm reminded of the importance of having fun for the sake of it.

So, in memoriam, for the little lock on the hill, thank you. I bought a red rose from Dalaran, rode out to the hill and logged out on your hill. May you always be happy wherever you are, chasing kobolds and feeding your imp deer.

/sniffles.

Eleven - A WoW Video

The other half got me hooked on Lady Gaga ROFL!

I was raiding Ulduar and was thinking of doing a video showcasing some of my favourite fights. Since I had a whole new bunch of footage and this song is my favourite at the moment, I decided to have some fun with it.

Also made another video sometime back featuring a song from Moulin Rouge.

This one cracked me up particularly and I hope you have fun watching it as much as I did making it!

Journey - A WoW Video

I decided to do an update (and clean-up) since I wasn't fully satisfied with my previous attempt at creating a backstory for my WoW character.

It's amazing what maintenance-induced boredom can drive one to do LOL.

Another Year Older, This Time A Lot Sadder

I was reminded of the date when my staff knocked on my door with a cake at midnight. I was rather touched that they knew, remembered and cared. Spent the first 6 hours after still in the office, got home at 7am, woke up at 9. Phone was full of well-wishes.

It rang as I sat at my desk checking my mail. The family at LA misses me, I yearn for their presence like a deep knell in my heart. Struggling not cry to as I joked with them over the phone, the voice I longed for most could not, would never come to the phone again. Ringing off, I sat numb at my desk with tears in my eyes and a deep aching inside.

Boss called to say best wishes, am I headed in for the meetings, press interviews and event later? Today will be more of that I guess, well-wishing, best tidings. It's not fair to unload, that it is anything but happy, joyous or celebrative for me. But the front has to be put up, the show has to go on.

I regret not having spent the last one with her, should have just gone out for that dinner. I regret not giving her the utmost priority when I should have, now all the power and money in the world would never do that. Work achievements sound hollow now, I work nonstop to drown out the loneliness in my heart instead.

I miss you Mum. I miss what your presence in my life meant, your silent support in no matter what I did, how I did. I miss knowing that no matter how badly I failed or disappointed, your love for me never wavered and I was always your son no matter what. I miss being able to share with you as I discover more in life and basking in your pride when I did do well. I miss the unconditional love and refuge you had for me at home no matter where I travelled or the tribulations in life I meet.

I hope you know right now, that no matter where or what you are still watching over me. I hope I am making you proud and I will always strive to do so. You never gave up on me and I will never do that to myself ever.

Happy birthday to me. Happy birthday to us. It was the day you gave me life. Without you I could not have been.

Biting Off More Than I Can Chew

Good news or bad news? For me, I always go for the bad first. I vaguely recall reading somewhere about what it says about one's personality but for the life of me I can't recall what now.

Anyway...

This month is going to be extremely frustrating what with the over-abundance of public holidays (never thought I'd hear myself bitching about THAT!) and its consequential dearth of working days. My job has evolved to so much more than its original job scope ; last night I bitchily commented that I wanted a total job title revamp. And to my surprise, my boss readily agreed. Well let's see 2 months from now...

Everyone's going off for their holidays - I had to cancel my LA trip. Ah what the hell. But I think I'm gonna miss my family for real, for once this Christmas, especially since everyone's gonna be there while I'm stuck here. 99.5% chance I'm gonna be spending it at work with my dorky staff.

I typed an entire long rant but reading it over, I laughed and deleted the whole chunk. Truth is, I'm having hella time with my work. Yes I get home at 7am in the mornings (This whole week!) and sleep at 9, only to wake up at noon and work a couple of hours from home before heading into the office again around 3-4pm. But I find myself strangely invigorated.

Yesterday while sorting my flood of emails (the best friend is gonna laugh when he sees my sorted folders...) I came across one of those mass-CC-fyi emails, in which the totally anal-retentive control freak of director from SAFRA wrote "Just follow up with Nic and he'll tell you how to handle it". I could have taken it as yet another "arrow" but stopping for a minute, I rather take it as a measure of how much the woman is depending on me. Yay for me.

Ok enough of all that. I will manage, I will overcome, I will succeed. And the good news? I've gone down from 90kg (Yes huney I was there) to 83kg currently in the span of 3 weeks. I fucking kid you not.